Everyone should have at least one coworker like The Coworker. He says the oddest, most hilariously uncomfortable, and off-the-wall things. Whenever he speaks, I want to both laugh really hard and sink into my seat under the heavy blanket of embarrassment that he SHOULD but is incapable of feeling. Yesterday, he told his legal assistant to clean the sparkles off her desk because that is where he snorts cocaine after work.
Today we exchanged secret Santa gifts. Our boss was The Coworker's secret Santa and gave him a nice pair of slippers. When he opened them he said, "Wow, someone really knows what I like...before bed." The entire office was howling.
This guy is the same guy who offered to marry me and have my babies after I completed a project for him. Writers for The Office couldn't invent a character like him if they tried. Although he would make a perfect accompaniment to Michael Scott.
He's one of the two people in the office that gives me assignments to complete. I often worry that I'm not getting enough exposure by only working closely with two attorneys. I am still just a temporary employee and my guaranteed six months of work is nearing its end. But these two attorneys keep me pretty busy and they are very happy with my work. I decided that it's much easier to convince two people that I am intelligent than it is to convince an entire office. So, I'll just mark that down as a good thing and hope that due to their seniority, they will be able to convince the management to keep me.
The other day, one attorney spent an hour and a half going over a new assignment with me. At the end he said, "Oh never mind, I'll just do it myself. It's too complicated." I'll admit, it WAS complicated. It was an issue involving a tax lien in a bankruptcy proceeding. And what I knew about bankruptcy could be inscribed by pen onto a single acorn. But I was really bummed that I had just invested 1.5 hours listening to a lecture for no good reason and I was kind of looking forward to the challenge. Then, at the very last minute, the attorney changed his mind. Looking very skeptical, he said, "Go ahead and give it a try. After you get a start, I'll help you complete it."
Aside from my litigation assignments, every project I have been given has absolutely terrified me. I have ZERO background knowledge in any of this government stuff. The big projects I have been given so far have involved, taxing districts, federal HIPAA laws, amending ordinances, and advising law enforcement. In car collision litigation, it's a big deal when you make a mistake. Not only do you let your client down, but you can really impact your client's financial situation. However, this is nothing compared to giving advise to a local government. When the government screws up, it's kind of a big deal.
The projects I have been assigned have been equal parts intense and unfamiliar. These assignments cause my mind to seize with fear every time I am left alone to sit at a computer researching obscure areas of law and drafting opinion letters for a client. But the deathly fear is directly proportional to the satisfaction that arises each time the "complex and confusing" become "organized and understood" in my brain. Being a lawyer is essentially just organizing information and concepts into an easy to understand and helpful (for your client) way. And applying the information and concepts to an actual real-life problem that a client is facing and offering helpful suggestions on what to do next is a lawyer's equivalent to winning the Powerball.
So today, I was excitedly nervous as I handed in my assignment, fully completed, to the attorney. I had just been on a self-confidence roller coaster. One moment, I would decide that he was right and the project was way above my level. The next, I would uncover a clue hidden within a federal statute and feel happy little thrills pulsing through my body. I like to call this phenomenon the Legal Researcher's High (and Low). I held my breath for a moment when I handed in my assignment. I was dying to know if I had met or fallen short of the expectations set out for me. The attorney carefully reviewed my memo, expressed a sign of shock, and told me it was excellent. He then instructed me to send it to the client as-is. I walked away calmly, stepped into my office and did a silent yet jubilant fist pump.
Success! As an attorney, you have to take your successes when you can. It is a given that you will mess up sometime. Every time that you don't, needs to be celebrated.
So, as much as I look at each new assignment with utter terror, I am also thrilled beyond measure to have another new area of law to investigate and massage and examine. Law is such a fascinating and expansive subject. You can research every day of your life and still confront new issues and problems. In that regard, being a lawyer is extremely satisfying. Being a lawyer is also as intellectual as academia, except it is extremely practical. It's too bad being a lawyer comes with a host of unpleasant things, like student loans, job insecurity, billable hours, egomaniac personalities, and socially inept colleagues. Aside from all THAT, it is a wonderful, rewarding, and challenging career.
Showing posts with label lawyer stuff. Show all posts
Showing posts with label lawyer stuff. Show all posts
Tuesday, December 10, 2013
Friday, September 13, 2013
The Nerd Fairy Visits
I continue to be the happiest person on earth. My work is amazing so far. It's too amazing. I have two feelings that are competing for my mind right now. One is total excitement and relief that I have finally found the perfect job for me. The other is anxiety and fear that all this wonderfulness will go away or disappear, either, because this is all a dream or because they are unable to extend my position after the original six months.
When I accepted the job, I was told I would be doing a lot of public disclosure stuff (mindless document review). So far, I've only been doing litigation (which is totally fine with me!). I've been asked to assist on a case that is going to trial in December. It's a personal injury case so I'm totally in my element and comfort zone. The litigation team (all four of us) were sitting around the conference table yesterday discussing litigation strategy. I was amazed at how much I knew about trial strategy and how much I could contribute. I was genuinely surprised.
I only have three years of litigation under my belt (only two years of active participation) and I've only co-chaired one trial, but here I was actively contributing to the strategy session. I was pinching myself and asking, "who is this person who has suddenly occupied my body?!" I feel like I've crossed a precipice. The one that divides newbies from non-newbies. It feels amazing. I have to say that I owe it to insurance defense work. When you defend cases for insurance companies you are exposed to so many different cases and issues that you quickly gain experience in a little bit of everything.
As idyllic and dreamlike as my position is, the actual work has been even more so. Everything is going so well that I feel like this job was made for me. My first day at work, I was asked to assist with researching an unusual and obscure issue on which there is not much case law or guidance. It just so happens that I had researched that same exact issue two months ago and had written an extensive motion on it. I was able to provide some information off the top of my head which, I'm hoping, earned me some major points.
I heard one of the litigation attorneys talking about an insurance coverage issue she was having in another case. Before I could stop myself, I blurted out, "Oh my gosh, can I help? I love insurance coverage. It's my favorite!" Half an hour later, I had finished drafting a request for tender. From the far reaches of my memory, I pulled out my knowledge of insurance company duties to defend and indemnify, standards for properly determining coverage, and extra-contractual damages. With each word I typed about breaches of good faith and coverage estoppel, I became giddy with happiness and a little person inside me was doing the happy dance on repeat. NERD ALERT.
My next assignment is to draft a complaint for declaratory judgment. This is like the jackpot of all jackpots for insurance law lovers like me. I'm so excited that I just spent an hour of my Friday evening researching sample complaints....for FUN.
Speaking of weekend, it could not have come at a better time! I just spent the past two days drafting an intense response to a summary judgment motion. It's lengthy and bursting with legal analysis. On Thursday I spent seven consecutive hours drafting it. I spent another seven consecutive hours on it today. By the time 4:30 rolled around, my brain was going to explode if I had to analogize one more case. I felt like my eyes were emitting rays of computer light. The next two days will give my brain plenty of time to rest.
But, honestly, I can't wait to go to work on Monday so I can get started on that complaint for declaratory judgment. I'm pretty sure the nerdy fairy has just inducted me into the nerd hall of fame.
When I accepted the job, I was told I would be doing a lot of public disclosure stuff (mindless document review). So far, I've only been doing litigation (which is totally fine with me!). I've been asked to assist on a case that is going to trial in December. It's a personal injury case so I'm totally in my element and comfort zone. The litigation team (all four of us) were sitting around the conference table yesterday discussing litigation strategy. I was amazed at how much I knew about trial strategy and how much I could contribute. I was genuinely surprised.
I only have three years of litigation under my belt (only two years of active participation) and I've only co-chaired one trial, but here I was actively contributing to the strategy session. I was pinching myself and asking, "who is this person who has suddenly occupied my body?!" I feel like I've crossed a precipice. The one that divides newbies from non-newbies. It feels amazing. I have to say that I owe it to insurance defense work. When you defend cases for insurance companies you are exposed to so many different cases and issues that you quickly gain experience in a little bit of everything.
As idyllic and dreamlike as my position is, the actual work has been even more so. Everything is going so well that I feel like this job was made for me. My first day at work, I was asked to assist with researching an unusual and obscure issue on which there is not much case law or guidance. It just so happens that I had researched that same exact issue two months ago and had written an extensive motion on it. I was able to provide some information off the top of my head which, I'm hoping, earned me some major points.
I heard one of the litigation attorneys talking about an insurance coverage issue she was having in another case. Before I could stop myself, I blurted out, "Oh my gosh, can I help? I love insurance coverage. It's my favorite!" Half an hour later, I had finished drafting a request for tender. From the far reaches of my memory, I pulled out my knowledge of insurance company duties to defend and indemnify, standards for properly determining coverage, and extra-contractual damages. With each word I typed about breaches of good faith and coverage estoppel, I became giddy with happiness and a little person inside me was doing the happy dance on repeat. NERD ALERT.
My next assignment is to draft a complaint for declaratory judgment. This is like the jackpot of all jackpots for insurance law lovers like me. I'm so excited that I just spent an hour of my Friday evening researching sample complaints....for FUN.
Speaking of weekend, it could not have come at a better time! I just spent the past two days drafting an intense response to a summary judgment motion. It's lengthy and bursting with legal analysis. On Thursday I spent seven consecutive hours drafting it. I spent another seven consecutive hours on it today. By the time 4:30 rolled around, my brain was going to explode if I had to analogize one more case. I felt like my eyes were emitting rays of computer light. The next two days will give my brain plenty of time to rest.
But, honestly, I can't wait to go to work on Monday so I can get started on that complaint for declaratory judgment. I'm pretty sure the nerdy fairy has just inducted me into the nerd hall of fame.
Wednesday, July 10, 2013
Just Plain Rude
One of our personal injury cases has turned into an insurance bad faith case seemingly overnight. This makes me happy. I love insurance bad faith almost as much as I love insurance coverage. Although a lot of other projects have been waiting in my work queue, I fervently drafted a letter to an opposing counsel on the bad faith case. I was very proud of my three page, persuasive letter which was brimming with legal authority and thoughtful analysis.
My boss gave me good feedback and told me I was starting to sound like "Attorney X," a notorious bad faith attorney in our area. Looking back, I took way too much pride in that compliment. My letter was addressed to a partner at a Big Law firm. A couple days later, opposing counsel responded to my letter. Except he did not address his response to me. He addressed it to one of the male partners in the firm. What? MY name was on that letter. Why would he respond to someone else? I was pissed. I turned down the opportunity to made a snarky comment in a follow-up letter. I almost wish I had. But that's not really my style.
I don't consider myself to be a shining proponent of feminism. Obviously, I'm not against women being considered and treated as equals in the work place. I'm just not very militant about it. I wouldn't turn down a male coworker's offer to help me nail a frame on my office wall or help me carry a heavy box. I think chivalry is awesome, not anti-feminist. I don't necessarily buy into the argument that women across the board earn less than male counterparts in the same circumstances (I may be incorrect in my thinking but I just don't have very high regard for the statistics and "studies" out there - in general I always take statistics with a grain of salt). I don't think being considered a "nice" person is a bad thing for a lawyer (not necessarily a feminist issue but more women tend to be labeled as "nice" or "gentle" than men, in my opinion).
BUT. BUT. Even if I will never win a gold medal for my work in advancing the plight of women in this country, I still hate when male chauvinism creeps into the work place. If I do good work, I want it to be recognized and acknowledged as MY work. And even if I'm not a partner and even if I don't have as much experience as my opponents, I would hope they would have enough respect for me as a human to deal with me directly rather than completely bypass me for a higher-up.
End. Rant.
My boss gave me good feedback and told me I was starting to sound like "Attorney X," a notorious bad faith attorney in our area. Looking back, I took way too much pride in that compliment. My letter was addressed to a partner at a Big Law firm. A couple days later, opposing counsel responded to my letter. Except he did not address his response to me. He addressed it to one of the male partners in the firm. What? MY name was on that letter. Why would he respond to someone else? I was pissed. I turned down the opportunity to made a snarky comment in a follow-up letter. I almost wish I had. But that's not really my style.
I don't consider myself to be a shining proponent of feminism. Obviously, I'm not against women being considered and treated as equals in the work place. I'm just not very militant about it. I wouldn't turn down a male coworker's offer to help me nail a frame on my office wall or help me carry a heavy box. I think chivalry is awesome, not anti-feminist. I don't necessarily buy into the argument that women across the board earn less than male counterparts in the same circumstances (I may be incorrect in my thinking but I just don't have very high regard for the statistics and "studies" out there - in general I always take statistics with a grain of salt). I don't think being considered a "nice" person is a bad thing for a lawyer (not necessarily a feminist issue but more women tend to be labeled as "nice" or "gentle" than men, in my opinion).
BUT. BUT. Even if I will never win a gold medal for my work in advancing the plight of women in this country, I still hate when male chauvinism creeps into the work place. If I do good work, I want it to be recognized and acknowledged as MY work. And even if I'm not a partner and even if I don't have as much experience as my opponents, I would hope they would have enough respect for me as a human to deal with me directly rather than completely bypass me for a higher-up.
End. Rant.
Monday, May 13, 2013
Yoga Pants And Ape Suits
Last night, mother's day evening, because my boss had promised a client that we would hand over a deliverable by Monday morning (and because I am nothing if not a procrastinator) I plopped down in front of my computer at precisely 8:30 p.m. and worked furiously. I researched and scoured case law and strung together semi-coherent sentences about complicated issues of law until my eyeballs literally lost their ability to focus. Two hours into my work I took a ten minute break to rest my eyes. After that, I didn't look up again until my project was completed, at 2 a.m.
I went to bed and dreamed about the memo I had just written. My dream self told me that I needed to take out the entire statement of facts because no one wants to read facts. Then I dreamed that my boss had a heart attack and this meant that I had a day off. I wonder if that is a sign that the mere five hours of sleep I get each night are catching up to me?
Today, after I handed in my project, the boss asked me to lead a conference call with the client to go over my research. It felt amazing. I knew the cases inside and out and when the client asked what year a specific case was published, I was able to rattle it off out of thin air, much to my own surprise. I felt so on fire and competent. The client would have never known that I was wearing yoga pants (working from home today).
As I was about to punch out for the day, my phone rang. It was a number I did not recognize. On the other line was the owner of a law firm near my house asking if I could interview today. I had completely forgotten that last week, after another long work night which ended at 1 a.m. I had whimsically sent my resume and a cover letter in response to a job posting I found on the internet. It was so close to my home, I figured that I had to apply.
"Can you be here in 40 minutes?" He asked.
I think the normal response would have been, "Heck yeah, I'll be there in 40 minutes" as a normal person would have proceeded to go to a clothing store and purchase something other than yoga pants for the interview. I, on the other hand, very uncooly admitted that I was wearing yoga pants. However, the interviewer was not able to reschedule anytime soon. 40 minutes from then was the only time he was free this week.
"We are a very casual firm." He prodded. "It won't bother me." No matter how casual of a firm it might have been, I doubted that they had ever conducted an interview in yoga pants.
He finally talked me into stopping by. I figured I would stop at a store on my way in and purchase any kind of pants in something close to my size that was anything but yoga pants. But the man on the other end of the line must have read my mind. He said, "Don't go buy clothing just for this interview. Honestly, just come as you are, it won't bother me."
Great. If I didn't show up in yoga pants he would know that I had bought something just for the interview against his instructions. If I DID show up in yoga pants....well, I was showing up in YOGA PANTS for heaven's sake! In the end I showed up in yoga pants. In doing so, I had just created the best interview story I have ever heard (well, aside from the one time I was interviewed by a lawyer who was chewing tobacco and spitting it into a chocolate milk container during the enitre interview).
As the interview began, the man went on and on about the position. It was for an associate attorney job in a successful practice in a niche and impressive area of law. It was a job that would require extensive travel and a hectic work schedule. It was a job that carried some degree of prestige. One that would challenge and satisfy. One that could take over my life, lead to an amazing career, and really suck me in.
Sitting there in that church-converted law office with an open floor plan filled with classic wooden desks and fancy woven rugs, clothed in my beloved yoga pants, I had a crazy realization. I couldn't help but notice how much different I am now from the me that went to lawschool.
The me that went to lawschool would have put on an ape costume and done cartwheels for this job (which is kind of funny considering that the current me hadn't even dressed for the interview and was sitting there in yoga pants). The old me would have drooled over the long hours, extensive travel, and challenging topics. The old me (the me that was a student athlete who worked every week day and babysat every week night pretty much from highschool through lawschool) would have loved this opportunity and would have worn this job on my sleeve like a fancy badge. That me was a highly motivated overachiever.
But the new me kept trying to feign interest. I actually had to force myself to sound excited and eager. While a tiny little peice of old me wanted to emerge from the murky depths of my apathy, it kept getting shut down. The overachiever that I once was has died. It didn't die overnight. It kind of fizzled away slowly. Somewhere between burning out in lawschool, having kids, and entering the dark side of my twenties, I lost that drive. When someone says, "long hours" I no longer think of an opportunity to prove myself, gain valuable experience, or work my way up the ladder of success. Now, all I can think of are the moments that I will not experience with my children. A half day of work on Saturday no longer equals a half day of extra experience and praise. It means one less trip to the zoo. One less ice cream cone enjoyed in the park. Two less meals as a family. Five less hours filled with hide and seek, bike riding, or reading stories.
Oh God. Who AM I? Who is this person who would prefer to change poopy diapers and be verbally assaulted by children than to craft clever arguments and develop litigation strategies. What in the world happened to me? Why the heck am I sitting in a prestigous law firm in two-day old YOGA PANTS?
Sadly, the longer I sat in that chair, the less I wanted that job. The Medusa-like call of success and prestige and money no longer held any power over me. As the interviewer rambled on about the 200 depositions he had taken last year, I grew sad. I had just given up an hour of rare weekday time with my kids for this?
The interview finally ended and as I walked out the door, I didn't even care whether he would call me back for round two. I was suddenly overcome with gratitude for my current job situation. Sure, my paycheck is kind of depressing but I get to spend two extra weekday mornings and afternoons with my children on the days I work from home.
I'm pretty dang lucky. Even if the old me would not have agreed.
I went to bed and dreamed about the memo I had just written. My dream self told me that I needed to take out the entire statement of facts because no one wants to read facts. Then I dreamed that my boss had a heart attack and this meant that I had a day off. I wonder if that is a sign that the mere five hours of sleep I get each night are catching up to me?
Today, after I handed in my project, the boss asked me to lead a conference call with the client to go over my research. It felt amazing. I knew the cases inside and out and when the client asked what year a specific case was published, I was able to rattle it off out of thin air, much to my own surprise. I felt so on fire and competent. The client would have never known that I was wearing yoga pants (working from home today).
As I was about to punch out for the day, my phone rang. It was a number I did not recognize. On the other line was the owner of a law firm near my house asking if I could interview today. I had completely forgotten that last week, after another long work night which ended at 1 a.m. I had whimsically sent my resume and a cover letter in response to a job posting I found on the internet. It was so close to my home, I figured that I had to apply.
"Can you be here in 40 minutes?" He asked.
I think the normal response would have been, "Heck yeah, I'll be there in 40 minutes" as a normal person would have proceeded to go to a clothing store and purchase something other than yoga pants for the interview. I, on the other hand, very uncooly admitted that I was wearing yoga pants. However, the interviewer was not able to reschedule anytime soon. 40 minutes from then was the only time he was free this week.
"We are a very casual firm." He prodded. "It won't bother me." No matter how casual of a firm it might have been, I doubted that they had ever conducted an interview in yoga pants.
He finally talked me into stopping by. I figured I would stop at a store on my way in and purchase any kind of pants in something close to my size that was anything but yoga pants. But the man on the other end of the line must have read my mind. He said, "Don't go buy clothing just for this interview. Honestly, just come as you are, it won't bother me."
Great. If I didn't show up in yoga pants he would know that I had bought something just for the interview against his instructions. If I DID show up in yoga pants....well, I was showing up in YOGA PANTS for heaven's sake! In the end I showed up in yoga pants. In doing so, I had just created the best interview story I have ever heard (well, aside from the one time I was interviewed by a lawyer who was chewing tobacco and spitting it into a chocolate milk container during the enitre interview).
As the interview began, the man went on and on about the position. It was for an associate attorney job in a successful practice in a niche and impressive area of law. It was a job that would require extensive travel and a hectic work schedule. It was a job that carried some degree of prestige. One that would challenge and satisfy. One that could take over my life, lead to an amazing career, and really suck me in.
Sitting there in that church-converted law office with an open floor plan filled with classic wooden desks and fancy woven rugs, clothed in my beloved yoga pants, I had a crazy realization. I couldn't help but notice how much different I am now from the me that went to lawschool.
The me that went to lawschool would have put on an ape costume and done cartwheels for this job (which is kind of funny considering that the current me hadn't even dressed for the interview and was sitting there in yoga pants). The old me would have drooled over the long hours, extensive travel, and challenging topics. The old me (the me that was a student athlete who worked every week day and babysat every week night pretty much from highschool through lawschool) would have loved this opportunity and would have worn this job on my sleeve like a fancy badge. That me was a highly motivated overachiever.
But the new me kept trying to feign interest. I actually had to force myself to sound excited and eager. While a tiny little peice of old me wanted to emerge from the murky depths of my apathy, it kept getting shut down. The overachiever that I once was has died. It didn't die overnight. It kind of fizzled away slowly. Somewhere between burning out in lawschool, having kids, and entering the dark side of my twenties, I lost that drive. When someone says, "long hours" I no longer think of an opportunity to prove myself, gain valuable experience, or work my way up the ladder of success. Now, all I can think of are the moments that I will not experience with my children. A half day of work on Saturday no longer equals a half day of extra experience and praise. It means one less trip to the zoo. One less ice cream cone enjoyed in the park. Two less meals as a family. Five less hours filled with hide and seek, bike riding, or reading stories.
Oh God. Who AM I? Who is this person who would prefer to change poopy diapers and be verbally assaulted by children than to craft clever arguments and develop litigation strategies. What in the world happened to me? Why the heck am I sitting in a prestigous law firm in two-day old YOGA PANTS?
Sadly, the longer I sat in that chair, the less I wanted that job. The Medusa-like call of success and prestige and money no longer held any power over me. As the interviewer rambled on about the 200 depositions he had taken last year, I grew sad. I had just given up an hour of rare weekday time with my kids for this?
The interview finally ended and as I walked out the door, I didn't even care whether he would call me back for round two. I was suddenly overcome with gratitude for my current job situation. Sure, my paycheck is kind of depressing but I get to spend two extra weekday mornings and afternoons with my children on the days I work from home.
I'm pretty dang lucky. Even if the old me would not have agreed.
Thursday, May 9, 2013
Love & Hate: Lawyer Edition...Brain Overheating
I hate working plaintiff cases. Probably because I'm cynical about most people and being an advocate for plaintiffs is a huge challenge for me. Also, dealing with medical providers gives me an ulcer. What? I can't just pay someone to give the medical opinion I want?
I love insurance defense. I like being on the "dark side." I love poking holes in arguments and claims. I like working with insurance companies. Not only is it repeat business but you get to deal with professionals who actually understand the system. There is also the challenge of representing a defendant while an insurance company pays your bills. Added bonus: coverage issues. If cases are like men's accessories, the typical personal injury lawsuit is a tie and a declaratory judgment insurance coverage lawsuit is a bow-tie. It's the nerdy, confusing, awkwardly sexy cousin. Maybe medical malpractice claims are ascots? Wow, anyway....sorry for that.
I love legal research.
I hate billable hours.
I both love and hate court appearances. The crazy mix of exhilaration and terror is fabulous. I am looking forward to my first summary judgment hearing next week.
I also both love and hate dealing with pro-se plaintiffs. Their letters are drenched in hyperbole and conspiracy theories. They are so dramatic and they take everything so personally. Their analysis of the law is usually very entertaining, especially when they get a lawstudent friend to write a letter for them. But they don't speak the language and are hard to reason with. The deck is so stacked againt pro-se plaintiffs that victories don't feel as good as they should.
I love yoga pants. Quality, durable, skin-tight yoga pants. It took me a while to come around but now I practically live in them. In fact, I just came back from a last-minute trip to Target during which I was wearing yoga pants with flats, my work-blouse, and a sequined hip-length cardigan. It was like elegance up top and comfort down low. I probably looked ridiculous. But I felt totally amazing.
Yoga pants for life! (I'm slightly deranged right now from lack of sleep and an abundance of work).
I love insurance defense. I like being on the "dark side." I love poking holes in arguments and claims. I like working with insurance companies. Not only is it repeat business but you get to deal with professionals who actually understand the system. There is also the challenge of representing a defendant while an insurance company pays your bills. Added bonus: coverage issues. If cases are like men's accessories, the typical personal injury lawsuit is a tie and a declaratory judgment insurance coverage lawsuit is a bow-tie. It's the nerdy, confusing, awkwardly sexy cousin. Maybe medical malpractice claims are ascots? Wow, anyway....sorry for that.
I love legal research.
I hate billable hours.
I both love and hate court appearances. The crazy mix of exhilaration and terror is fabulous. I am looking forward to my first summary judgment hearing next week.
I also both love and hate dealing with pro-se plaintiffs. Their letters are drenched in hyperbole and conspiracy theories. They are so dramatic and they take everything so personally. Their analysis of the law is usually very entertaining, especially when they get a lawstudent friend to write a letter for them. But they don't speak the language and are hard to reason with. The deck is so stacked againt pro-se plaintiffs that victories don't feel as good as they should.
I love yoga pants. Quality, durable, skin-tight yoga pants. It took me a while to come around but now I practically live in them. In fact, I just came back from a last-minute trip to Target during which I was wearing yoga pants with flats, my work-blouse, and a sequined hip-length cardigan. It was like elegance up top and comfort down low. I probably looked ridiculous. But I felt totally amazing.
Yoga pants for life! (I'm slightly deranged right now from lack of sleep and an abundance of work).
Tuesday, May 7, 2013
Legalese and Spouses
The problem with being a lawyer is that most people (non-lawyers) don't understand what you do. My dad is a lawyer. Whenever I showed any curiosity in his career or had to interview him for "career day" I left the conversation feeling more confused than ever. "I have no idea what my dad does," I thought to myself. Why couldn't my daddy just be a firefighter or a teacher or a doctor?
When I was in lawschool, the parents of the children I babysat always seemed so impressed. "Our babysitter is going to be a lawyer," I heard them brag on one or two occassions. I remember feeling very important. Then one day, a little girl that I babysat for asked me, "What is a lawyer?" The four year old had a very clear picture of what her daddy (a doctor) did at work, "he makes people feel better!" I tried to explain to the four year old the excitement and challenges of litigation and representing people who have been sued. It didn't quite translate into child-speak.
"When people are in car accidents, they have doctors to help them get better and tow trucks to tow their cars and lawyers to help them....um...to protect their....uhhhhh.....to help make sure people don't take all their money."
"Oh, like the police? Where's your gun? Do you have a badge? Have you been to JAIL?"
When you really boil it down, being a lawyer is a very abstract concept. Lawyers get paid to use their brains, think up ideas and arguments, and talk in a language that only the Courts understand. So yeah. That's what I do all day. Think, argue, and interpret.
The other night, I went to happy hour with my boss, his wife, and a mediator. When my boss' wife joined us she asked, "How did your summary judgment hearing go? Did you win your argument about circumstantial evidence? Did you file your motion in limine?"
My eyes bugged straight out of my head. My mouth might have hinged open, like a robot with a malfunctioning jaw. I looked like I had just seen a cat drive a car down a highway. My boss' spouse is one of Them. She's a non-lawyer. How is she conversing so easily about summary judgment motions and circumstanital evidence and motions in limine? I was thoroughly impressed.
My husband likes to talk to me about his work. And I always try my best to sound interested and give the appropriate amount of good feedback and praises. But I have been increasingly frustrated by his lack of ability to know what the heck I do all day. When I try to tell him about a really great ruling we got on a motion, his eyes kind of glaze over. After I explain how excited I am to have found an important case to use in a motion, he turns back to his computer and lets out closed-mouth "huh" sound (oddly, it's the same sound that he often gives me when I ask him if he likes what I made for dinner).
So, I kind of stopped telling him about my day or talking to him about my cases. He has also stopped asking. I've reached the point where I've given up hope of having someone at home to talk to about my days at work. It's a bit isolating and it's very frustrating. Especially when I have an uncontrollable urge to vent about something crazy opposing counsel did or an achievement that we accomplished.
I never wanted to marry a lawyer but I do miss the companionship of someone who can related to my work experiences. I guess this is where a network of lawyer friends come in handy. Maybe someday I will have time for a social life. But honestly, as lame as it sounds, I really like the company of my children right now (which is a good thing because it's often the only company outside of work that I get to enjoy). I never worry about them not laughing at my jokes (all I have to do is throw a fart sound in at the end). Or judging me when I have seconds of cake. Or thinking that I am weird when I throw all caution to the wind and act like a child. I will be so sad when they suddenly become too cool to hang out with mom. Darn, then I will have to go out and find some real friends.
When I was in lawschool, the parents of the children I babysat always seemed so impressed. "Our babysitter is going to be a lawyer," I heard them brag on one or two occassions. I remember feeling very important. Then one day, a little girl that I babysat for asked me, "What is a lawyer?" The four year old had a very clear picture of what her daddy (a doctor) did at work, "he makes people feel better!" I tried to explain to the four year old the excitement and challenges of litigation and representing people who have been sued. It didn't quite translate into child-speak.
"When people are in car accidents, they have doctors to help them get better and tow trucks to tow their cars and lawyers to help them....um...to protect their....uhhhhh.....to help make sure people don't take all their money."
"Oh, like the police? Where's your gun? Do you have a badge? Have you been to JAIL?"
When you really boil it down, being a lawyer is a very abstract concept. Lawyers get paid to use their brains, think up ideas and arguments, and talk in a language that only the Courts understand. So yeah. That's what I do all day. Think, argue, and interpret.
The other night, I went to happy hour with my boss, his wife, and a mediator. When my boss' wife joined us she asked, "How did your summary judgment hearing go? Did you win your argument about circumstantial evidence? Did you file your motion in limine?"
My eyes bugged straight out of my head. My mouth might have hinged open, like a robot with a malfunctioning jaw. I looked like I had just seen a cat drive a car down a highway. My boss' spouse is one of Them. She's a non-lawyer. How is she conversing so easily about summary judgment motions and circumstanital evidence and motions in limine? I was thoroughly impressed.
My husband likes to talk to me about his work. And I always try my best to sound interested and give the appropriate amount of good feedback and praises. But I have been increasingly frustrated by his lack of ability to know what the heck I do all day. When I try to tell him about a really great ruling we got on a motion, his eyes kind of glaze over. After I explain how excited I am to have found an important case to use in a motion, he turns back to his computer and lets out closed-mouth "huh" sound (oddly, it's the same sound that he often gives me when I ask him if he likes what I made for dinner).
So, I kind of stopped telling him about my day or talking to him about my cases. He has also stopped asking. I've reached the point where I've given up hope of having someone at home to talk to about my days at work. It's a bit isolating and it's very frustrating. Especially when I have an uncontrollable urge to vent about something crazy opposing counsel did or an achievement that we accomplished.
I never wanted to marry a lawyer but I do miss the companionship of someone who can related to my work experiences. I guess this is where a network of lawyer friends come in handy. Maybe someday I will have time for a social life. But honestly, as lame as it sounds, I really like the company of my children right now (which is a good thing because it's often the only company outside of work that I get to enjoy). I never worry about them not laughing at my jokes (all I have to do is throw a fart sound in at the end). Or judging me when I have seconds of cake. Or thinking that I am weird when I throw all caution to the wind and act like a child. I will be so sad when they suddenly become too cool to hang out with mom. Darn, then I will have to go out and find some real friends.
Thursday, May 2, 2013
Marching Into The Lion's Den
On Saturday after we took our family portraits, the photographer told us that the pictures would be ready by Wednesday (yesterday). I know most photographers take several weeks to turn around their proofs so I was really impressed by the promise.
Wednesday came and I neurotically began to check my emails for the pictures. I also neurotically began to refresh the photographer's blog and website for sneak peaks. Let's just say that my obsession with family portraits mixes poorly with my vanity. Thursday morning, when there was no sign of the photos, I sent a cheerful little e-mail to the photographer. He told me to expect the photos by the afternoon. Of course, I took that literally and began to, once again, neurotically check my emails every three minutes as soon as the big hand passed over the "12."
And now, here we are at 9:00 p.m., no sign of the photos and I'm going crazy! Every little buzz from my phone sends my heart racing. I don't think I will be able to concentrate again until the photos arrive.
As I mentioned, I skinned my knees really badly last Thursday on my way home from work. My knees have scabbed over and they are so freaking painful. Forget about the fact that I can't wear skirts to work (the staple of my work wardrobe). Everytime I straighten or bend my knees the scabs pull from the skin. Ryan likes to pull up on my legs and frequently bumps into my large bruises. I occassionally forget about my injuries and will try to kneel on one of the knees, especially when I'm on the floor with the kids or changing Ryan's diaper, causing me to let out a high-pitched shriek. I feel so crippled. I swear, you never know quite how important a body part is until it's injured.
Yesterday, one of the partners asked me to research whether we have a good faith argument to oppose a motion. I did my research. I tried so hard to find a clever, killer argument. Unfortunately, I think we are hosed on this issue. I wrote a neat little memo outlining my thoughts. The basic gist of the memo was, "there is this tiny little shred of a weak-ass argument we can make but we will not win this one."
As I was typing the memo I kept hoping that he wouldn't want to oppose this motion. I thought to myself, "Well, at least *I* won't be the one that has to face the judge."
The partner's reply: "Draft the opposition and be prepared to argued it."
Oh great. Eff. My. Life.
Wednesday came and I neurotically began to check my emails for the pictures. I also neurotically began to refresh the photographer's blog and website for sneak peaks. Let's just say that my obsession with family portraits mixes poorly with my vanity. Thursday morning, when there was no sign of the photos, I sent a cheerful little e-mail to the photographer. He told me to expect the photos by the afternoon. Of course, I took that literally and began to, once again, neurotically check my emails every three minutes as soon as the big hand passed over the "12."
And now, here we are at 9:00 p.m., no sign of the photos and I'm going crazy! Every little buzz from my phone sends my heart racing. I don't think I will be able to concentrate again until the photos arrive.
As I mentioned, I skinned my knees really badly last Thursday on my way home from work. My knees have scabbed over and they are so freaking painful. Forget about the fact that I can't wear skirts to work (the staple of my work wardrobe). Everytime I straighten or bend my knees the scabs pull from the skin. Ryan likes to pull up on my legs and frequently bumps into my large bruises. I occassionally forget about my injuries and will try to kneel on one of the knees, especially when I'm on the floor with the kids or changing Ryan's diaper, causing me to let out a high-pitched shriek. I feel so crippled. I swear, you never know quite how important a body part is until it's injured.
Yesterday, one of the partners asked me to research whether we have a good faith argument to oppose a motion. I did my research. I tried so hard to find a clever, killer argument. Unfortunately, I think we are hosed on this issue. I wrote a neat little memo outlining my thoughts. The basic gist of the memo was, "there is this tiny little shred of a weak-ass argument we can make but we will not win this one."
As I was typing the memo I kept hoping that he wouldn't want to oppose this motion. I thought to myself, "Well, at least *I* won't be the one that has to face the judge."
The partner's reply: "Draft the opposition and be prepared to argued it."
Oh great. Eff. My. Life.
Saturday, April 6, 2013
Nannies, Parties, & Litigation: All In A Day's Work
I woke up at 7 a.m. (groan!) this morning to begin a day of interviewing part-time nannies. It went mostly well and I already have my heart set on someone. My ideal pick has two boys that are the same ages as my boys. The family seems laid back, down to earth, and very embracing of the craziness that goes along with raising boys.
Out of all the homes we visited, Ryan was most at ease here. Jacob had a rare opportunity to go on vacation with his grandparents this week so he did not get to tag along. Ryan walked right up to the boy his age and they played so nicely together. The dad was also present and I could tell he plays a big role in his kids' lives. They have a nice-sized yard that is completely fenced in. They eat chocolate (evidence was peaking out from the pantry-- I don't trust people who don't eat chocolate!). Plus, they have really awesome toys (outdoor trampoling, indoor trampoline, outdoor big toy, indoor play toy). I never realized that little things would play such a big role in making me feel at ease with a potential nanny. Out of all the places we visited, I could most easily picture my children at that home.
There may be an issue with the days they are available so I'm crossing my fingers. I really hope that it works out! Especially considering that my two weeks' notice has turned into ONE week's notice and I need someone to start in three days!
After the morning of interviews, we attended my neice's first birthday party. We met up with my parents at the party and they returned Jacob to us. As Jacob ran into the house, he made a bee-line straight for Ryan. The look on Ryan's face when he saw his big brother for the first time in four days was simply priceless. The two musketeers were reunited and they were both so very happy.
The party was a cute princess safari theme and the boys had fun playing with their family and with their neice's toys. Jacob had even more fun foraging for used wrapping and tissue paper (after gifts were opened) and constructing a gigantic mountain out of them. As he went around picking up used trimmings, he announced proudly, "I collect pretty bows!" Apparently, as of today, he is an amateur bow-collector.
The party fizzled down after presents were opened and we made our way back home. When we arrived, it felt great to have our whole family under the same roof again. It was especially nice to have both boys back together. They agreed.
The day flew by and at 7:00p.m., I decided I should get my butt in gear and think about what we would have for dinner. An impressive 30 minutes later, I had a full meal on the table! After realizing that my pantry is nearly bare (I haven't gone grocery shopping in two weeks), I opted for my favorite, quick meal of pasta and almost homemade sauce. I say "almost" homemade because I use canned tomatoes. Some people may think that is taboo but I find that fresh tomatoes are not always in the best shape or even in season (it's hit or miss for us- mostly miss) but you can be always be guaranteed great tasting tomatoes out of a can so long as you simmer them for a good 15 minutes. While the tomatoes simmer, I throw in fresh garlic, salt, pepper, red pepper flakes, balsamic vinegar (secret ingredient!), and freshly grated parmesan cheese. I poured the pasta sauce over whole wheat spagethi, accompanied it with chicken-artichoke sausages from Costco (amazing!), and paired it with homemade garlic breadsticks (actually and truly homemade). I whip up the breadstick dough in advance, let it rise once, shape it into breadsticks, and keep them in the freezer until I need to bake them.
As I was smack in the middle of fixing dinner, my boss texted me and asked if I had time to talk about a case. I gave him a call and we talked strategy about two motions we have pending. With one hand holding my phone and the other hand alternating between stirring the sauce, checking the breadsticks, and gesturing widly in the air to match the enthusiasm in my voice, we outlined a response to one motion and a reply to another. It was kind of surreal to talk about sanctions and court rules as I contemporaneously put dinner on the table. Did I ever mention that I love litigation?
And noow, even though the kids are in bed, I am sitting for the first time all day, and I have the entire evening to unwind on the couch, I am so worked-up and excited to put my thoughts into cleverly crafted arguments that I'm researching and briefing away instead. This is proof that I really do love litigation. I don't willingly scrifice my one hour of Facebook/Pinterest catch-up time for just anything!
Out of all the homes we visited, Ryan was most at ease here. Jacob had a rare opportunity to go on vacation with his grandparents this week so he did not get to tag along. Ryan walked right up to the boy his age and they played so nicely together. The dad was also present and I could tell he plays a big role in his kids' lives. They have a nice-sized yard that is completely fenced in. They eat chocolate (evidence was peaking out from the pantry-- I don't trust people who don't eat chocolate!). Plus, they have really awesome toys (outdoor trampoling, indoor trampoline, outdoor big toy, indoor play toy). I never realized that little things would play such a big role in making me feel at ease with a potential nanny. Out of all the places we visited, I could most easily picture my children at that home.
There may be an issue with the days they are available so I'm crossing my fingers. I really hope that it works out! Especially considering that my two weeks' notice has turned into ONE week's notice and I need someone to start in three days!
After the morning of interviews, we attended my neice's first birthday party. We met up with my parents at the party and they returned Jacob to us. As Jacob ran into the house, he made a bee-line straight for Ryan. The look on Ryan's face when he saw his big brother for the first time in four days was simply priceless. The two musketeers were reunited and they were both so very happy.
Ryan's new glasses
The party was a cute princess safari theme and the boys had fun playing with their family and with their neice's toys. Jacob had even more fun foraging for used wrapping and tissue paper (after gifts were opened) and constructing a gigantic mountain out of them. As he went around picking up used trimmings, he announced proudly, "I collect pretty bows!" Apparently, as of today, he is an amateur bow-collector.
The party fizzled down after presents were opened and we made our way back home. When we arrived, it felt great to have our whole family under the same roof again. It was especially nice to have both boys back together. They agreed.
Back to the same old games
The day flew by and at 7:00p.m., I decided I should get my butt in gear and think about what we would have for dinner. An impressive 30 minutes later, I had a full meal on the table! After realizing that my pantry is nearly bare (I haven't gone grocery shopping in two weeks), I opted for my favorite, quick meal of pasta and almost homemade sauce. I say "almost" homemade because I use canned tomatoes. Some people may think that is taboo but I find that fresh tomatoes are not always in the best shape or even in season (it's hit or miss for us- mostly miss) but you can be always be guaranteed great tasting tomatoes out of a can so long as you simmer them for a good 15 minutes. While the tomatoes simmer, I throw in fresh garlic, salt, pepper, red pepper flakes, balsamic vinegar (secret ingredient!), and freshly grated parmesan cheese. I poured the pasta sauce over whole wheat spagethi, accompanied it with chicken-artichoke sausages from Costco (amazing!), and paired it with homemade garlic breadsticks (actually and truly homemade). I whip up the breadstick dough in advance, let it rise once, shape it into breadsticks, and keep them in the freezer until I need to bake them.
As I was smack in the middle of fixing dinner, my boss texted me and asked if I had time to talk about a case. I gave him a call and we talked strategy about two motions we have pending. With one hand holding my phone and the other hand alternating between stirring the sauce, checking the breadsticks, and gesturing widly in the air to match the enthusiasm in my voice, we outlined a response to one motion and a reply to another. It was kind of surreal to talk about sanctions and court rules as I contemporaneously put dinner on the table. Did I ever mention that I love litigation?
And noow, even though the kids are in bed, I am sitting for the first time all day, and I have the entire evening to unwind on the couch, I am so worked-up and excited to put my thoughts into cleverly crafted arguments that I'm researching and briefing away instead. This is proof that I really do love litigation. I don't willingly scrifice my one hour of Facebook/Pinterest catch-up time for just anything!
Thursday, April 4, 2013
Notches In The Lawyer Belt
I strolled into the office this morning expecting a very quiet Thursday. I ended up with a wonderful, awesome, stressful hot mess.
My boss called me at about 9:30 telling me that he was not able to come into the office today and needed my help with something. "Sure," I replied. I assumed that he wanted me to draft a motion or do some legal research on an obscure area of law.
"I need you to cover a mediation."
"Ha ha ha."
"I know I joke around a lot. But I'm absolutely serious."
"Ha ha ha....wait....wha???"
"I need you to cover a mediation. It starts at 2."
"You mean as in 4.5 hours?"
"Yes. It's on the X case"
If you could have turned life into a still shot at that very moment, you would have seen the look of pure terror fall across my face like a curtain. You know that scene in Jurassic Park where the little girl escapes from the upturned car and turns around to find a gigantic T-Rex staring at her? She looked like this:
Yeah. That is exactly how I felt.
Not only have I never heard of this case before, but I have never handled a mediation on my own before. In fact, I had only participated in one, as second-chair to a partner about three years ago. On top of that stress, I was woefully underdressed for a mediation. My light grey skirt did NOT match the tweed suit jacket that I had shoved into my drawer in case of last minute client meetings. Plus, I managed to rip my panty hose the second I walked into the office just half an hour earlier. The second that happened, I just had one of those feelings that today was going to be an interesting day.
I hunkered down, pulled the file, read every report, caught up on pertinent medical records, added up the special damages, and tried to diagram the names of all the parties and participants. Just my luck, this case involved three different collisions and several layers of automobile insurance. I learned what little I could in three hours, packed up the case files, and headed downtown towards the mediation, making an emergency 3 minute stop at Ann Taylor Loft to purchase the first black skirt and pair of sheer hose that I could find, then I barrelled awkwardly down the streets in the rain dragging a 50 pound box of case files on wheels behind me.
But it was all worth it. The mediation was fantastic! There was another party aligned with our interests and the attorney and I sat in the same room and strategized and joked and told stories. The other attorney was very experienced and had good ideas for getting the case settled. He was hilarious and entertaining and even made crude jokes (my favorite kind).
It was a complicated case with a lot of things going haywire. It took nearly three hours before we got the opening demand from the plaintiff. We finally settled the case at 7 o'clock pm (mediation was supposed to go from 2pm to 6pm). And although it was stressful and crazy and unexpected and long, it was such a great experience.
Although the day was full of challenges, I walked out of the room feeling proud and re-energized to be part of the legal profession. The people I spent the day with were not only intelligent and creative thinkers who did a great job of representing their clients, but they were professional in dealing with the case, and, during the periods of downtime, were a blast to chat with.
The topics of our conversations during downtime were so derailed that I one point (in front of my boss who joined us at the end of the mediation), we were discussing potty training boys and, in front of a room full of clients and lawyers, I offered up this brilliant piece of poetry:"If you sprinkle when you tinkle, be a sweety, wipe the seaty."... I groaned internally as I was saying it but, thankfully, the only responses were chuckles and laughs.
At one point in the middle of the mediation, I looked around the table and found myself surrounded by middle age to older men from all walks and cultures. I was by far the youngest attorney present. I was the only female. But as we all sat around talking about our children, parenting, interesting cases, war stories, and the legal profession in general, I found myself oddly at ease. I felt that I had more in common with them than not. And although I was the youngest and most unexperienced in the room, they made me feel as if I was a valuable asset to the mediation and gave me an opportunity to speak my two cents.
So now, I have two mediations under my belt. And while that is not a lot, that is 100% more than yesterday. This is pretty much the only way to gain experience as a lawyer--by looking anxiety right in the eyeball, throwing yourself into the chaos, and one-by-one, adding small notches to your lawyer belt.
My boss called me at about 9:30 telling me that he was not able to come into the office today and needed my help with something. "Sure," I replied. I assumed that he wanted me to draft a motion or do some legal research on an obscure area of law.
"I need you to cover a mediation."
"Ha ha ha."
"I know I joke around a lot. But I'm absolutely serious."
"Ha ha ha....wait....wha???"
"I need you to cover a mediation. It starts at 2."
"You mean as in 4.5 hours?"
"Yes. It's on the X case"
If you could have turned life into a still shot at that very moment, you would have seen the look of pure terror fall across my face like a curtain. You know that scene in Jurassic Park where the little girl escapes from the upturned car and turns around to find a gigantic T-Rex staring at her? She looked like this:
Yeah. That is exactly how I felt.
Not only have I never heard of this case before, but I have never handled a mediation on my own before. In fact, I had only participated in one, as second-chair to a partner about three years ago. On top of that stress, I was woefully underdressed for a mediation. My light grey skirt did NOT match the tweed suit jacket that I had shoved into my drawer in case of last minute client meetings. Plus, I managed to rip my panty hose the second I walked into the office just half an hour earlier. The second that happened, I just had one of those feelings that today was going to be an interesting day.
I hunkered down, pulled the file, read every report, caught up on pertinent medical records, added up the special damages, and tried to diagram the names of all the parties and participants. Just my luck, this case involved three different collisions and several layers of automobile insurance. I learned what little I could in three hours, packed up the case files, and headed downtown towards the mediation, making an emergency 3 minute stop at Ann Taylor Loft to purchase the first black skirt and pair of sheer hose that I could find, then I barrelled awkwardly down the streets in the rain dragging a 50 pound box of case files on wheels behind me.
But it was all worth it. The mediation was fantastic! There was another party aligned with our interests and the attorney and I sat in the same room and strategized and joked and told stories. The other attorney was very experienced and had good ideas for getting the case settled. He was hilarious and entertaining and even made crude jokes (my favorite kind).
It was a complicated case with a lot of things going haywire. It took nearly three hours before we got the opening demand from the plaintiff. We finally settled the case at 7 o'clock pm (mediation was supposed to go from 2pm to 6pm). And although it was stressful and crazy and unexpected and long, it was such a great experience.
Although the day was full of challenges, I walked out of the room feeling proud and re-energized to be part of the legal profession. The people I spent the day with were not only intelligent and creative thinkers who did a great job of representing their clients, but they were professional in dealing with the case, and, during the periods of downtime, were a blast to chat with.
The topics of our conversations during downtime were so derailed that I one point (in front of my boss who joined us at the end of the mediation), we were discussing potty training boys and, in front of a room full of clients and lawyers, I offered up this brilliant piece of poetry:"If you sprinkle when you tinkle, be a sweety, wipe the seaty."... I groaned internally as I was saying it but, thankfully, the only responses were chuckles and laughs.
At one point in the middle of the mediation, I looked around the table and found myself surrounded by middle age to older men from all walks and cultures. I was by far the youngest attorney present. I was the only female. But as we all sat around talking about our children, parenting, interesting cases, war stories, and the legal profession in general, I found myself oddly at ease. I felt that I had more in common with them than not. And although I was the youngest and most unexperienced in the room, they made me feel as if I was a valuable asset to the mediation and gave me an opportunity to speak my two cents.
So now, I have two mediations under my belt. And while that is not a lot, that is 100% more than yesterday. This is pretty much the only way to gain experience as a lawyer--by looking anxiety right in the eyeball, throwing yourself into the chaos, and one-by-one, adding small notches to your lawyer belt.
Thursday, February 7, 2013
A Margarita Worthy Day
Today was awesome. My boss and I finished drafting an appellate brief. (I love researching and briefing. I may suck at organizing tangible things but I love organizing arguments!) A large part of our brief is based upon briefing my boss already did at the trial court level. But I was able to expand on it using some of my own my additional research. And I'm not gonna lie, I was pretty dang proud of our combined efforts.
When my boss handed me a copy of the brief for a final review (and so I could take on the monotonous task of adding page numbers to the table of contents and table of authorities...yuk!), I noticed that he had added my name and bar number to the cover page as co-counsel. This means that if the decision gets published, my name will be attached to an appellate opinion! This is so cool (unless of course we get creamed by the Court of Appeals, then maybe not so cool).
Is it weird that I am more excited about this than I was for Christmas?
Another task I thoroughly enjoy at work is explaining the process of litigation to non-lawyers. I love when I have the opportunity to explain what little I know about rules, procedures, and strategy to clients. And since I work for a new firm, we have some new-hires and support staff that are not that familiar with civil litigation. I'm not the best teacher but I do enjoy the challenge. All these little opportunities to teach and explain to others may eventually (and hopefully) make me a better oral advocate for trials and hearings. Because right now, I'm pretty much just lucky when I don't stutter over a big word or when I actually remember that one specific words that I am thinking of in my brain.
After we finished the brief, I tackled a lot of things on my to-do list, and cleared(ish) off my desk. It feels good to clear the clutter. I'm pretty sure this occassion calls for a margarita! (Or maybe I will just settle for my favorite tea with the usual extra creamer and three packs of Splenda?).
Also, can I just say...some people need to NOT post everything on FB. EW.
I give this person a FB time-out.
When my boss handed me a copy of the brief for a final review (and so I could take on the monotonous task of adding page numbers to the table of contents and table of authorities...yuk!), I noticed that he had added my name and bar number to the cover page as co-counsel. This means that if the decision gets published, my name will be attached to an appellate opinion! This is so cool (unless of course we get creamed by the Court of Appeals, then maybe not so cool).
Is it weird that I am more excited about this than I was for Christmas?
Another task I thoroughly enjoy at work is explaining the process of litigation to non-lawyers. I love when I have the opportunity to explain what little I know about rules, procedures, and strategy to clients. And since I work for a new firm, we have some new-hires and support staff that are not that familiar with civil litigation. I'm not the best teacher but I do enjoy the challenge. All these little opportunities to teach and explain to others may eventually (and hopefully) make me a better oral advocate for trials and hearings. Because right now, I'm pretty much just lucky when I don't stutter over a big word or when I actually remember that one specific words that I am thinking of in my brain.
After we finished the brief, I tackled a lot of things on my to-do list, and cleared(ish) off my desk. It feels good to clear the clutter. I'm pretty sure this occassion calls for a margarita! (Or maybe I will just settle for my favorite tea with the usual extra creamer and three packs of Splenda?).
Also, can I just say...some people need to NOT post everything on FB. EW.
I give this person a FB time-out.
Wednesday, January 30, 2013
Doing Time...Out
When I get home from work, the first thing I usually encounter is a recounting of Jacob's behavior of the entire day...given by him....and totally unprompted. When he looks sheepish, I know he has a time-out or two to report. Other times, he will smile wide and exclaim, "I was so good! No time-outs today!" It cracks me up that he feels compelled to tattle on himself.
Although he is pretty good about giving me an honest report card, it's never easy trying to get any details out of the guy! This is precisely why four year olds are not allowed to testify:
Jake: "Mommy, I had to go to time-out four times today."
Me: "Well, what happened? Why did you have to go to time out?"
Jake: "I had to go to time out the first time because Cousin1 was screaming. Then I had to go another time because Cousin2 took away Cousin1's toys. Then another time, Cousin2 was jumping on the furniture so I had to get in trouble. And...I can't remember the rest."
I would love, just for hilarity's sake, to get all the cousins in a room and take turns cross-examining them. Fingers would be pointing in all directions. Hmmm, it's interesting...the similarity between kids and clients.
Speaking of clients and work, I had an incredibly frustrating day today. I left my house at 11:45 a.m. for a 1:30 hearing in a different city. Although it should have been simple and quick, I didn't pick up the kids until 6:30. Not only did the hearing start late but, even though I was there for a simple "housekeeping" matter, ours was the very last case called. So I sat there for 3 hours and listened to all the other attorneys. What's worse is that I had only eaten one piece of toast and one measley yogurt all day. It's hard to listen to bullsh*t for three hours on an empty stomach!
Listening to other attorneys never ceases to shock me. I can't believe the shit judges have to put up with! I overheard one attorney repeatedly swear and rag on his opposing counsel to his client. Gee, I wonder why people hate attorneys! After one particularly painful hearing, an attorney on the losing side made snarky comments to the judge about how unethical opposing counsel's behavior was (btw, it was so definitely NOT unethical) and then even accused the judge of making a borderline unethical ruling. I don't know what planet THESE people come from, but I pretty much thought it was a universal rule that you do NOT insult the judge?! Right? Am I crazy?!
Then during another hearing, one attorney was very upset things weren't going his way and kept making sarcastic comments, complete with grandious and dramatic hand gestures to portray his exasperation with the court and the other party. He even made the pro-se party on the other side (who declared through sobs that she is undergoing cancer treatment) cry during the hearing! Things were so surreal that I forgot I was watching real court hearings. I'm sure I noticibly gasped and chuckled as if I was in the audience of a Judge Judy taping.
My favorite hearings of the day were the ones involving pro-se parties. One pro-se party asked the court to strike the other side's supporting declaration on the basis that he didn't know the person signing the declaration. To top it off, this guy had the squeakiest shoes on the planet. They didn't make a normal squeaky noise though. They made a mini-whoopie cushion fart noise each time he took a step toward or away from the bench.
After three hours of THAT. My head hurt from all the ridiculousness and my butt hurt from three hours of sitting. And when we finally were called, we discovered that our hearing had to be continued anyway. Geez! At least I learned a lot about how NOT to behave before a judge.
As if I hadn't had enough circus for one day, when I picked up the kids, Jacob was dressed like this:
He refused to take the wig off even for a quick trip to the grocery store, during the middle of which, somewhere between dried cereal and baking supplies, he loudly screamed that he "had to POOP!" When I asked if he could hold it until we paid for groceries, he screamed even louder (to the joy of everyone around us) "NO, THERE IS A HUGE POOP TRYING TO COME OUT OF MY BUTT. I'M POOPING OUT MY CHICKEN AND RICE."
It was lovely.
And Ryan was, as always, such a breeze. He is such an easy and happy baby that he barely makes the blog anymore.
Although he is pretty good about giving me an honest report card, it's never easy trying to get any details out of the guy! This is precisely why four year olds are not allowed to testify:
Jake: "Mommy, I had to go to time-out four times today."
Me: "Well, what happened? Why did you have to go to time out?"
Jake: "I had to go to time out the first time because Cousin1 was screaming. Then I had to go another time because Cousin2 took away Cousin1's toys. Then another time, Cousin2 was jumping on the furniture so I had to get in trouble. And...I can't remember the rest."
I would love, just for hilarity's sake, to get all the cousins in a room and take turns cross-examining them. Fingers would be pointing in all directions. Hmmm, it's interesting...the similarity between kids and clients.
Speaking of clients and work, I had an incredibly frustrating day today. I left my house at 11:45 a.m. for a 1:30 hearing in a different city. Although it should have been simple and quick, I didn't pick up the kids until 6:30. Not only did the hearing start late but, even though I was there for a simple "housekeeping" matter, ours was the very last case called. So I sat there for 3 hours and listened to all the other attorneys. What's worse is that I had only eaten one piece of toast and one measley yogurt all day. It's hard to listen to bullsh*t for three hours on an empty stomach!
Listening to other attorneys never ceases to shock me. I can't believe the shit judges have to put up with! I overheard one attorney repeatedly swear and rag on his opposing counsel to his client. Gee, I wonder why people hate attorneys! After one particularly painful hearing, an attorney on the losing side made snarky comments to the judge about how unethical opposing counsel's behavior was (btw, it was so definitely NOT unethical) and then even accused the judge of making a borderline unethical ruling. I don't know what planet THESE people come from, but I pretty much thought it was a universal rule that you do NOT insult the judge?! Right? Am I crazy?!
Then during another hearing, one attorney was very upset things weren't going his way and kept making sarcastic comments, complete with grandious and dramatic hand gestures to portray his exasperation with the court and the other party. He even made the pro-se party on the other side (who declared through sobs that she is undergoing cancer treatment) cry during the hearing! Things were so surreal that I forgot I was watching real court hearings. I'm sure I noticibly gasped and chuckled as if I was in the audience of a Judge Judy taping.
My favorite hearings of the day were the ones involving pro-se parties. One pro-se party asked the court to strike the other side's supporting declaration on the basis that he didn't know the person signing the declaration. To top it off, this guy had the squeakiest shoes on the planet. They didn't make a normal squeaky noise though. They made a mini-whoopie cushion fart noise each time he took a step toward or away from the bench.
After three hours of THAT. My head hurt from all the ridiculousness and my butt hurt from three hours of sitting. And when we finally were called, we discovered that our hearing had to be continued anyway. Geez! At least I learned a lot about how NOT to behave before a judge.
As if I hadn't had enough circus for one day, when I picked up the kids, Jacob was dressed like this:
He refused to take the wig off even for a quick trip to the grocery store, during the middle of which, somewhere between dried cereal and baking supplies, he loudly screamed that he "had to POOP!" When I asked if he could hold it until we paid for groceries, he screamed even louder (to the joy of everyone around us) "NO, THERE IS A HUGE POOP TRYING TO COME OUT OF MY BUTT. I'M POOPING OUT MY CHICKEN AND RICE."
It was lovely.
And Ryan was, as always, such a breeze. He is such an easy and happy baby that he barely makes the blog anymore.
I'm Too Crazy For My Bar Card
In the past four days I have done a lot of things that make me feel lawyerish. During my weekend, I wrote a 12 page response to a motion. This week I drafted an Appellate Brief. And tomorrow, I am going to attended my first Pre-Trial Conference. Feeling lawyerish again feels so good. Initially, I had a rough start transitioning back after taking a year off to do pre-litigation paralegal work. I'm finally getting back into a groove.
And I'm starting to breath a sigh of relief regarding my long term laywer career. I'm past that all-so-important three year benchmark of being an attorney. You know, that qualifier on job postings that says "minimum of three years experience required?" Well, I'm finally there! Not that I feel my job is in jeopardy or that I want to change jobs. It's just a big sigh of relief knowing I qualify for whole new set of lawyer jobs in case anything happened.
While I've done a lot of things in the past couple days that have made me feel like a legit lawyer, nothing has made me feel more legit than tonight when I turned off the TV after the kids went to bed, realized there was nothing good on, and instead opted to crank out more billable hours. Watch out world! I'm a wild child!
I often wish I could get a bird's eye view of what other people my age do on a regular basis. I often feel like I'm so out of touch with the regular activities of "normal" people. Do other 28 year old still go out on on a regular basis? Do they have, let's see, what's the word? Oh yeah, dates? (In the past five months, I can recall going on only one date with my husband- we didn't even celebrate our five year anniversary!). Do other 28-year olds go to pubs and happy hours and those unfamiliar things called movie theaters?
Whenever I tell my boss what my weekend plans are (after he asks me if I have any plans), he declares to me that his life was so much different at 28. And by different, I'm assuming he means that he did things that were remotely entertaining and involved some level of fun, irrational behavior. You know, something a little more crazy than throwing all caution to the wind and licking BOTH beaters of cookie dough.
Is it because I am an introvert? Is it because people generally piss me off? I'm too busy? Is it because I don't have quick access to fun places to hang out? Is it because I'm a mom? Or is it a good mix of all of those? Who knows....honestly, I don't really feel compelled to change my activities (although a date would be nice!). I'm fine with staying low key for now.
Now excuse me while I re-organize all the recipes on my Pinterest food board into new categories!
And I'm starting to breath a sigh of relief regarding my long term laywer career. I'm past that all-so-important three year benchmark of being an attorney. You know, that qualifier on job postings that says "minimum of three years experience required?" Well, I'm finally there! Not that I feel my job is in jeopardy or that I want to change jobs. It's just a big sigh of relief knowing I qualify for whole new set of lawyer jobs in case anything happened.
While I've done a lot of things in the past couple days that have made me feel like a legit lawyer, nothing has made me feel more legit than tonight when I turned off the TV after the kids went to bed, realized there was nothing good on, and instead opted to crank out more billable hours. Watch out world! I'm a wild child!
I often wish I could get a bird's eye view of what other people my age do on a regular basis. I often feel like I'm so out of touch with the regular activities of "normal" people. Do other 28 year old still go out on on a regular basis? Do they have, let's see, what's the word? Oh yeah, dates? (In the past five months, I can recall going on only one date with my husband- we didn't even celebrate our five year anniversary!). Do other 28-year olds go to pubs and happy hours and those unfamiliar things called movie theaters?
Whenever I tell my boss what my weekend plans are (after he asks me if I have any plans), he declares to me that his life was so much different at 28. And by different, I'm assuming he means that he did things that were remotely entertaining and involved some level of fun, irrational behavior. You know, something a little more crazy than throwing all caution to the wind and licking BOTH beaters of cookie dough.
Is it because I am an introvert? Is it because people generally piss me off? I'm too busy? Is it because I don't have quick access to fun places to hang out? Is it because I'm a mom? Or is it a good mix of all of those? Who knows....honestly, I don't really feel compelled to change my activities (although a date would be nice!). I'm fine with staying low key for now.
Now excuse me while I re-organize all the recipes on my Pinterest food board into new categories!
Tuesday, January 22, 2013
Sometimes I Live Out A Legal Drama
*Updated to fix the misplaced hyphen in the title (it was driving me crazy!)
I've had some notable deposition experiences in my life. My very first deposition is by far my favorite story. It involves a 6-foot stuffed bear. I couldn't make this stuff up if I tried. Plus I have pictures. Although I can't imagine anything topping that, today's deposition was pretty memorable.
Today's deponent was a 70+ year old man. He's your typical ornery, fiesty older gentlemen. But his answers were hilarious. They absolutely did not make sense. For example, if someone would have asked him what color the sky was, he would have answered "square." The other attorneys around the table were looking exasperated, flustered, and impatient. I, on the other hand, was trying very hard to keep a gigantic smile from forming across the surface of my face.
The deposition started out friendly as the elder gentleman flirted with the four of us in the room (all women). By the end of it, he was very offended by all of the questioning and took each question personally. Whenever an attorney raised an objection, he immediately stopped his narrative as emitted rays of icy death from his eyes both of which were partially hidden by his down-turned, silver eyebrows. Each time he gave The Look, I nearly choked on my tongue. At one point, he let out a string of french explitives which he refused to translate into English much to the anger of another attorney and the court reporter. When he wasn't being ornery, he was thickly laying on the charm and sending overtly flirty compliments in my direction.
I was fascinated that I was the only one who found his behavior to be completely hilarious. During the entire deposition I kept thinking, "this could be a scene from The Good Wife."
I love days like today. They remind me why I love practicing law: people. Litigation brings out the most interesting aspects of a person's character. With some people, litigation can be one long, drawn-out cat fight. Or a series of bitch slaps. People can be so childish sometimes, but most especially when they are in an extremely contention situation and thousands to hundreds of thousands of dollars are on the line. I absolutely love it. I love it in the same way I love reading obnoxious posts on Facebook or watching people act like the characters in Mean Girls. The flattery of 70+ year old men doesn't hurt either.
I've had some notable deposition experiences in my life. My very first deposition is by far my favorite story. It involves a 6-foot stuffed bear. I couldn't make this stuff up if I tried. Plus I have pictures. Although I can't imagine anything topping that, today's deposition was pretty memorable.
Today's deponent was a 70+ year old man. He's your typical ornery, fiesty older gentlemen. But his answers were hilarious. They absolutely did not make sense. For example, if someone would have asked him what color the sky was, he would have answered "square." The other attorneys around the table were looking exasperated, flustered, and impatient. I, on the other hand, was trying very hard to keep a gigantic smile from forming across the surface of my face.
The deposition started out friendly as the elder gentleman flirted with the four of us in the room (all women). By the end of it, he was very offended by all of the questioning and took each question personally. Whenever an attorney raised an objection, he immediately stopped his narrative as emitted rays of icy death from his eyes both of which were partially hidden by his down-turned, silver eyebrows. Each time he gave The Look, I nearly choked on my tongue. At one point, he let out a string of french explitives which he refused to translate into English much to the anger of another attorney and the court reporter. When he wasn't being ornery, he was thickly laying on the charm and sending overtly flirty compliments in my direction.
I was fascinated that I was the only one who found his behavior to be completely hilarious. During the entire deposition I kept thinking, "this could be a scene from The Good Wife."
I love days like today. They remind me why I love practicing law: people. Litigation brings out the most interesting aspects of a person's character. With some people, litigation can be one long, drawn-out cat fight. Or a series of bitch slaps. People can be so childish sometimes, but most especially when they are in an extremely contention situation and thousands to hundreds of thousands of dollars are on the line. I absolutely love it. I love it in the same way I love reading obnoxious posts on Facebook or watching people act like the characters in Mean Girls. The flattery of 70+ year old men doesn't hurt either.
Sunday, December 9, 2012
Grammar Hurts
Wow. Is already Sunday? How did that happen?
This week was crazy but satisfying. I wrote enough motions, oppositions, and reply briefs to make up for the entire year that I was a paralegal and wrote none at all. We are in the midst of a discovery war with opposing counsel on a case that is going to trial early next year. Every discovery we want to conduct is requiring either a motion to compel or an opposition to a motion for protective order. I love discovery motions. I'm a sick and twisted person because they totally rock my world.
In the past week, I wrote approximately 30 pages in motion briefing. And with every word that I typed I was like "take that! And that! Oh yeah! Beat this!" I know. I'm gross. I was having so much fun that, even though our opposition wasn't due for another couple days, as soon as the kids were in bed, I picked up my laptop to engage in more wordly swordplay. I have a sickness.
Let's see, what else happened? Oh yeah, on Friday I accidentally sexually harrassed my boss...He was showing off a new pair of jeans. I told him that I had a pair of the same brand and I really liked them. We were discussing the qualities of the brand and, I wasn't really thinking and I said, "yeah, they make your butt look good." What I meant, of course, was "they make A PERSON'S butt look good" as in the third person, general sense of the word "you." He thought I just complimented HIS butt and replied, "uh, thanks." Then he walked away.
OMG.
I wanted to die.
A paralegal overhead it and came into my office with a shocked look on her face. I explained what I meant to say and she started giggling hysterically. My face felt hot and I'm sure I was bright red.
I stayed in my office for a good three hours after that.
In other news, Ryan is eight months old today! He is such a chill, easy baby. Every since we used the cry-it-out method (which only took two nights of crying), he's been going to bed so easily. A little too easily, in fact. I change his diaper, put on his pjs, feed him a bottle, rock him for a minute, then lay him in his crib while he is still awake. He curls up on his side and drifts to sleep without a peep! From all the babysitting that I've done, I've never enountered a child/baby like that! I've never imagined that I'd ever have one! I swear that he is laying some kind of trap or prank for me.
My big boy has two bottom teeth. He loves to clap his hands. He claps his hands at anything and everything. He's mobile now, which is fun to watch but frustrating. I can't just set him down and grab laundry. I have to make sure the entire room is free of small objects and obstructions before I divert my attention elsewhere.
He's so good at feeding himself and chewing food. We went out to breakfast the other day and I gave him a piece of my toast. He bit off tiny pieces and chewed them up. He was so content and ate the whole thing! He also loves pumpkin spice bread and pizza crust and pretty much anything I'm eating. He's been feeding himself Cheerios, soft carrot pieces, and banana slices for quite a while now. I love that he can feed himself during dinner. It means I get to eat with TWO HANDS!
This week was crazy but satisfying. I wrote enough motions, oppositions, and reply briefs to make up for the entire year that I was a paralegal and wrote none at all. We are in the midst of a discovery war with opposing counsel on a case that is going to trial early next year. Every discovery we want to conduct is requiring either a motion to compel or an opposition to a motion for protective order. I love discovery motions. I'm a sick and twisted person because they totally rock my world.
In the past week, I wrote approximately 30 pages in motion briefing. And with every word that I typed I was like "take that! And that! Oh yeah! Beat this!" I know. I'm gross. I was having so much fun that, even though our opposition wasn't due for another couple days, as soon as the kids were in bed, I picked up my laptop to engage in more wordly swordplay. I have a sickness.
Let's see, what else happened? Oh yeah, on Friday I accidentally sexually harrassed my boss...He was showing off a new pair of jeans. I told him that I had a pair of the same brand and I really liked them. We were discussing the qualities of the brand and, I wasn't really thinking and I said, "yeah, they make your butt look good." What I meant, of course, was "they make A PERSON'S butt look good" as in the third person, general sense of the word "you." He thought I just complimented HIS butt and replied, "uh, thanks." Then he walked away.
OMG.
I wanted to die.
A paralegal overhead it and came into my office with a shocked look on her face. I explained what I meant to say and she started giggling hysterically. My face felt hot and I'm sure I was bright red.
I stayed in my office for a good three hours after that.
In other news, Ryan is eight months old today! He is such a chill, easy baby. Every since we used the cry-it-out method (which only took two nights of crying), he's been going to bed so easily. A little too easily, in fact. I change his diaper, put on his pjs, feed him a bottle, rock him for a minute, then lay him in his crib while he is still awake. He curls up on his side and drifts to sleep without a peep! From all the babysitting that I've done, I've never enountered a child/baby like that! I've never imagined that I'd ever have one! I swear that he is laying some kind of trap or prank for me.
My big boy has two bottom teeth. He loves to clap his hands. He claps his hands at anything and everything. He's mobile now, which is fun to watch but frustrating. I can't just set him down and grab laundry. I have to make sure the entire room is free of small objects and obstructions before I divert my attention elsewhere.
He's so good at feeding himself and chewing food. We went out to breakfast the other day and I gave him a piece of my toast. He bit off tiny pieces and chewed them up. He was so content and ate the whole thing! He also loves pumpkin spice bread and pizza crust and pretty much anything I'm eating. He's been feeding himself Cheerios, soft carrot pieces, and banana slices for quite a while now. I love that he can feed himself during dinner. It means I get to eat with TWO HANDS!
Friday, November 30, 2012
On Sounding Manly, Lie Training, And Laughing At Sick Pets
Apparently, my voice is too high for a lawyer's voice. I've been acutely and self-consciously aware of this fact since a partner at a prior firm mentioned this to me over a year ago. He then proceeded to give me tips on how to sound more authoritative. He quipped that an older female client doesn't sound very assured when her lawyer sounds young and high-pitchy.
His point was well made. I took it to heart. Ever since then, I've struggled to sound more authoritative. It's really hard to talk in a deeper voice on purpose and to not sound like a raspy serial killer.
Although I'm trying, I haven't quite mastered the skill. Occassionally, when I'm not thinking about it or when I'm caught off guard, I will resort to my high-pitched "phone" voice. The former partner who originally mentioned this whole thing to me over a year ago is now my current boss. And today, after a phone conferece with another attorney, he mentioned it to me again.
It's frustrating. He's 100% right. I need to sound more like a lawyer. And unfortunately, that means sounding more masculine. The frustrating thing is that it's simply not easy to change your voice and still sound natural. I need more practice or just some better tips/training.
Not only does my boss think I need to sound more authoritative, he thinks I need training on how to "lie." I have to admit that when it comes to lying, I suck. I almost always crack a huge suspicious grin when pressed. I tend to think this is a QUALITY in my character, not a deficit. But my boss decided that my "lie" training should start today. (p.s., my boss is actually a funny and awesome guy, this isn't as bad as it sounds and is mostly just in good fun). When we called up a colleague about meeting for happy hour, my boss challenged me to give the receptionist a pretent name.
"Hello, how may I direct your call."'
"Yes. Can I speak to Sarah please."
"Who may I ask is calling?"
".....Brenda."
"Wait, is this CP?"
"....giggle, giggle. YES!"
Not only did I fail at lying, but the sweet old lady receptionist sounded pretty annoyed by what she called my "prank." I immediately called her back to apologize. I was going to explain about my "lie training." Because THAT sounds completely normal, right? But as soon as I said I was sorry, she told me she had to go and promptly hung up. Now I feel HORRIBLE! I'm pretty sure it's horrific karma to eff with a receptionist. I'm sure that's in a rule book somewhere.
See. Lying is bad. It gets you in trouble. Lawyers do not need help tarnishing the reputation of their profession. I think from now on, I will stick to simply "molding the facts to fit my theory of the case."
After work, we eventually did meet up with our former coworkers for happy hour. We all used to work at the same firm about two years ago. Some of us left. Some of us left and returned. Some of us are still there. I love this group. They are my favorite people ever. If I could build my ideal law firm with all my favorite people to work with, they would be there. We're loud. We're rowdy. We're inappropriate. We're such a diverse group of individual that from the outside, we do not look like we would all be friends. It's amazing how a workplace can bring all different types of people together and give us something in common. I love it.
During happy hour I drank just one beer and that was enough to get me in trouble. By the end of happy hour, I was in an uncontrollable giggling rage. (Talk about trying to sound more authoritative!). Everything seemed funny to me and I couldn't stop laughing. Unfortunately, this is when someone started to talk about their dog having cancer. My beer was still in full force and I giggled through the whole sad story. I am SO going to hell. (On the positive: hell is more likely to have beer).
I arrived home late but with just enough time to cuddle my baby and hang out with my big kid before bed. I'm so looking forward to spending an entire weekend with them. Even when they are cranky and whinny. Happy hours put everything into a good perspective. I guess that's why they are called "happy" hours.
His point was well made. I took it to heart. Ever since then, I've struggled to sound more authoritative. It's really hard to talk in a deeper voice on purpose and to not sound like a raspy serial killer.
Although I'm trying, I haven't quite mastered the skill. Occassionally, when I'm not thinking about it or when I'm caught off guard, I will resort to my high-pitched "phone" voice. The former partner who originally mentioned this whole thing to me over a year ago is now my current boss. And today, after a phone conferece with another attorney, he mentioned it to me again.
It's frustrating. He's 100% right. I need to sound more like a lawyer. And unfortunately, that means sounding more masculine. The frustrating thing is that it's simply not easy to change your voice and still sound natural. I need more practice or just some better tips/training.
Not only does my boss think I need to sound more authoritative, he thinks I need training on how to "lie." I have to admit that when it comes to lying, I suck. I almost always crack a huge suspicious grin when pressed. I tend to think this is a QUALITY in my character, not a deficit. But my boss decided that my "lie" training should start today. (p.s., my boss is actually a funny and awesome guy, this isn't as bad as it sounds and is mostly just in good fun). When we called up a colleague about meeting for happy hour, my boss challenged me to give the receptionist a pretent name.
"Hello, how may I direct your call."'
"Yes. Can I speak to Sarah please."
"Who may I ask is calling?"
".....Brenda."
"Wait, is this CP?"
"....giggle, giggle. YES!"
Not only did I fail at lying, but the sweet old lady receptionist sounded pretty annoyed by what she called my "prank." I immediately called her back to apologize. I was going to explain about my "lie training." Because THAT sounds completely normal, right? But as soon as I said I was sorry, she told me she had to go and promptly hung up. Now I feel HORRIBLE! I'm pretty sure it's horrific karma to eff with a receptionist. I'm sure that's in a rule book somewhere.
See. Lying is bad. It gets you in trouble. Lawyers do not need help tarnishing the reputation of their profession. I think from now on, I will stick to simply "molding the facts to fit my theory of the case."
After work, we eventually did meet up with our former coworkers for happy hour. We all used to work at the same firm about two years ago. Some of us left. Some of us left and returned. Some of us are still there. I love this group. They are my favorite people ever. If I could build my ideal law firm with all my favorite people to work with, they would be there. We're loud. We're rowdy. We're inappropriate. We're such a diverse group of individual that from the outside, we do not look like we would all be friends. It's amazing how a workplace can bring all different types of people together and give us something in common. I love it.
During happy hour I drank just one beer and that was enough to get me in trouble. By the end of happy hour, I was in an uncontrollable giggling rage. (Talk about trying to sound more authoritative!). Everything seemed funny to me and I couldn't stop laughing. Unfortunately, this is when someone started to talk about their dog having cancer. My beer was still in full force and I giggled through the whole sad story. I am SO going to hell. (On the positive: hell is more likely to have beer).
I arrived home late but with just enough time to cuddle my baby and hang out with my big kid before bed. I'm so looking forward to spending an entire weekend with them. Even when they are cranky and whinny. Happy hours put everything into a good perspective. I guess that's why they are called "happy" hours.
Saturday, October 27, 2012
Journey To Building A Plaintiff Practice: Preface
Yesterday afternoon, I sat in on a client meeting that ran a little late. By the time it had ended, I had missed my normal ferry boat and knew that I wouldn't get to the ferry dock in time for the next sailing. The only reasonable thing to do? Impromptu happy hour!
My boss and I walked across the street to our favorite dive bar/diner. Over $3 beers, I was dubbed the "President of Plaintiff Cases" -- or something like that. I work for a firm that largely does insurance defense work. The thing about insurance defense is that all you need is an in with an insurance company and you are golden. You sit around and wait for cases to come in on their own. The fax machine buzzes and... cha-ching! New case!
But plaintiff cases are different. It's harder to bring clients in. And you can only bring them in one at a time. It takes a lot of work: marketing, networking, advertising. All the stuff that makes me shudder. Since I worked at a plaintiff firm for a year and have (although scant) experience dealing exclusively in plaintiff case, I've been given the opportunity to take our plaintiff work and run with it. I've also been eagerly encouraged to assist in bringing in some clients.
Building a plaintiff practice nearly from scratch? No problem!
I'm going to start researching, reading, and networking. Perhaps develop a marketing plan. I have no idea what I'm doing. This should get interesting! Feel free to chime in with any tips :)
My boss and I walked across the street to our favorite dive bar/diner. Over $3 beers, I was dubbed the "President of Plaintiff Cases" -- or something like that. I work for a firm that largely does insurance defense work. The thing about insurance defense is that all you need is an in with an insurance company and you are golden. You sit around and wait for cases to come in on their own. The fax machine buzzes and... cha-ching! New case!
But plaintiff cases are different. It's harder to bring clients in. And you can only bring them in one at a time. It takes a lot of work: marketing, networking, advertising. All the stuff that makes me shudder. Since I worked at a plaintiff firm for a year and have (although scant) experience dealing exclusively in plaintiff case, I've been given the opportunity to take our plaintiff work and run with it. I've also been eagerly encouraged to assist in bringing in some clients.
Building a plaintiff practice nearly from scratch? No problem!
I'm going to start researching, reading, and networking. Perhaps develop a marketing plan. I have no idea what I'm doing. This should get interesting! Feel free to chime in with any tips :)
Monday, October 1, 2012
Warning: Post Contains Nearly Sickening Levels of Positivity About Being A Lawyer
My favorite philosopher from my high school Humanities class was Boethius, a Roman dude from the 6th century. He faced some pretty rough times-- imprisonment that led to his eventual execution. The basic theme from his most famous work is that good things and bad things are both transitory so we shouldn't let either have much power over us. According to Boethius, most of the time, we can't do anything to make sure we end up on the winning side of luck. Fortune is fickle. The solution is to be detached.
This kind of reminds me of the first version of the adage"bad things happen to good people."
His philosophical explorations make me want to step back, no matter how "good" or "bad" things are and focus on just "being." To accept everything as an experience. When things are bad, learn from them and move on. When things are good, stay humble, and remember that everything can turn around tomorrow.
But, at the same time, I kind of want to disagree with him. I want to believe that, while we cannot control our environment, we can to some extent make our own luck. We can prepare as best we can and arm ourselves with knowledge, preparedness, and skill. And while I wish I could learn to stay detached during the hard times, when things are good, I want to scream from happiness at the top of my lungs. I'm not good at hiding my feelings. Not ever.
So, with that intro, I have to say: My job is so freaking awesome!!!! AHHH! I love it. Love it. LOVE IT.
There is no clearer sign that you are right where you should be when you leave the office EVERYDAY skipping down the hallway shouting, "I love my job!" I feel so fortunate. How many people actually feel that way every day?
I know my job is still new and that, as Boethius says, fortune is fickle, but right now, things are so awesome. I'm not going to be detached. In fact, I'm going to revel in it as long as I can. Because everyday I walk into my office and I do something new. On any given day, I learn at least 5 new things. I do something challenging. I do something uncomfortable.
I've been at my new job for only 8 days. And, although I only work 6 hours a day, each day is jam-packed. My work days are fully concentrated with challenges. In the past 8 work days, I've written 6 motions (for cases in three different counties). I've written a demand letter. I've met clients. I've participated in conferences. I've answered two sets of written discovery. I've prepared three answers to complaints. While I liked my old job, I've done more actual attorney work in the past 8 days than I ever did in the year I spent at my last job. No matter how much you like your job, if you aren't using your skills, your education, or your full potential, it will feel as if a part of you is missing.
As I come to work each day, I try to put my finger on exactly why being a litigation attorney is so awesome. By now, I think I kind of figured it out. With every task I complete, I'm shaping an end product. The trial at the end of the road is like a grand production, and each step along the way is a real opportunity to mold an aspect of that production. In litigation, you really get the sense that you are doing something of value on a daily basis. You see meaningful results of your work, at first immediately in a grant or denial of a motion, and then in the long run, as you present or keep evidence out of trial and get a, hopefully good, jury verdict.
And being a litigation attorney is also like a strategic game of chess. For every action I take, the opposing party makes a counter-move and vice-versa. But, unlike a never-ending game of chess, I get to see immediate results. After I write and file a motion, the other side will respond, and then the court will eventualy take action. Walking out of a hearing (or rather sitting at your desk while the partner waks out of a hearing) with an order from the court granting your wish, is a pretty amazing feeling. When that happens, it's like I literally see my cases progressing right before my eyes. And they are progressing because of things that I did!
In any legal field, with experience comes mastery and confidence. But, the laws are always changes. The court rules are always being amended. The clients are always different. The case facts are always posing new challenges. At the same time, you can be both an experienced litigator and still know absolutely nothing about a certain issue of the law. It's so wonderful.
On top of all that, lawyers truly are "counselors." We have a skill that is specialized. We know things that our clients do not know. We have such an awesome responsibility to guide our clients through the litigation process, educate them, assist them, make them comfortable, and help them make decisions about their case. I absolutetly love the client-based, customer service aspect about being an attorney.
Between helping people, seeing end-results on an almost daily basis, gaining mastery of the law while at the same time staying challenged, litigation is a pretty awesome gig. At the end of the day, I feel such a sense of accomplishment. And even though coming home to my babies is one of my favorite parts of the day, sometimes, it is really hard to force myself to leave after just 6 hours of work.
Who knows, all this may change tomorrow. Or maybe IT will stay the same and I will be the one to change. But for now, things could not get better. I'm going to ride this positivity out for as long as it will carry me.
This kind of reminds me of the first version of the adage"bad things happen to good people."
His philosophical explorations make me want to step back, no matter how "good" or "bad" things are and focus on just "being." To accept everything as an experience. When things are bad, learn from them and move on. When things are good, stay humble, and remember that everything can turn around tomorrow.
But, at the same time, I kind of want to disagree with him. I want to believe that, while we cannot control our environment, we can to some extent make our own luck. We can prepare as best we can and arm ourselves with knowledge, preparedness, and skill. And while I wish I could learn to stay detached during the hard times, when things are good, I want to scream from happiness at the top of my lungs. I'm not good at hiding my feelings. Not ever.
So, with that intro, I have to say: My job is so freaking awesome!!!! AHHH! I love it. Love it. LOVE IT.
There is no clearer sign that you are right where you should be when you leave the office EVERYDAY skipping down the hallway shouting, "I love my job!" I feel so fortunate. How many people actually feel that way every day?
I know my job is still new and that, as Boethius says, fortune is fickle, but right now, things are so awesome. I'm not going to be detached. In fact, I'm going to revel in it as long as I can. Because everyday I walk into my office and I do something new. On any given day, I learn at least 5 new things. I do something challenging. I do something uncomfortable.
I've been at my new job for only 8 days. And, although I only work 6 hours a day, each day is jam-packed. My work days are fully concentrated with challenges. In the past 8 work days, I've written 6 motions (for cases in three different counties). I've written a demand letter. I've met clients. I've participated in conferences. I've answered two sets of written discovery. I've prepared three answers to complaints. While I liked my old job, I've done more actual attorney work in the past 8 days than I ever did in the year I spent at my last job. No matter how much you like your job, if you aren't using your skills, your education, or your full potential, it will feel as if a part of you is missing.
As I come to work each day, I try to put my finger on exactly why being a litigation attorney is so awesome. By now, I think I kind of figured it out. With every task I complete, I'm shaping an end product. The trial at the end of the road is like a grand production, and each step along the way is a real opportunity to mold an aspect of that production. In litigation, you really get the sense that you are doing something of value on a daily basis. You see meaningful results of your work, at first immediately in a grant or denial of a motion, and then in the long run, as you present or keep evidence out of trial and get a, hopefully good, jury verdict.
And being a litigation attorney is also like a strategic game of chess. For every action I take, the opposing party makes a counter-move and vice-versa. But, unlike a never-ending game of chess, I get to see immediate results. After I write and file a motion, the other side will respond, and then the court will eventualy take action. Walking out of a hearing (or rather sitting at your desk while the partner waks out of a hearing) with an order from the court granting your wish, is a pretty amazing feeling. When that happens, it's like I literally see my cases progressing right before my eyes. And they are progressing because of things that I did!
In any legal field, with experience comes mastery and confidence. But, the laws are always changes. The court rules are always being amended. The clients are always different. The case facts are always posing new challenges. At the same time, you can be both an experienced litigator and still know absolutely nothing about a certain issue of the law. It's so wonderful.
On top of all that, lawyers truly are "counselors." We have a skill that is specialized. We know things that our clients do not know. We have such an awesome responsibility to guide our clients through the litigation process, educate them, assist them, make them comfortable, and help them make decisions about their case. I absolutetly love the client-based, customer service aspect about being an attorney.
Between helping people, seeing end-results on an almost daily basis, gaining mastery of the law while at the same time staying challenged, litigation is a pretty awesome gig. At the end of the day, I feel such a sense of accomplishment. And even though coming home to my babies is one of my favorite parts of the day, sometimes, it is really hard to force myself to leave after just 6 hours of work.
Who knows, all this may change tomorrow. Or maybe IT will stay the same and I will be the one to change. But for now, things could not get better. I'm going to ride this positivity out for as long as it will carry me.
Sunday, September 23, 2012
Falling Back In Love With Law
I loved law school. Not the highschool-level drama and insane personalities from the ranks of both professors and students. But I loved the classes. I loved reading caselaw. I loved learning the historical transformation of law as the court's reviewed different factual scenarios and as social norms changed. I loved not just learning the final decision of the courts but the reasoning and policy behind those opinions.
It's been a while since I've read a court case that wasn't part of a legal research project for work. But tonight, as I was catching up on my political news, it dawned on me to look up and read last year's Supreme Court decision on Obamacare (yes, this was my wild Saturday night and, yes, I do have issues). When I discovered that the original opinion is nearly 200 pages long, I decided to just stick with the summary. But I became to engrossed that I kept reading. The first couple pages of the opinion is a REALLY good primer on the roles of the Federal versus State governments and the "enumerated powers" of the Federal government versus the broad "police powers" of the States. It totally re-kindled my love for Constitutional Law.
Oh man, I love it. I love it all! I am a total law geek. This (in addition to insurance coverage issues) is the kind of stuff that gets me hot and bothered. And....the Commerce Clause! Shiver. Reading about enumerated powers and the Commerce Clause has the same affect on me as, I'm imaging, the movie Magic Mike has on *normal* people.
If it weren't for the whole lawyer thing, I would be chomping at the bit to be a Political Science professor, or to have a job in politics.
Speaking of the "lawyer thing," I am also falling back in love with my profession. I think I have the best job in the world. It is seriously awesome. And in making that bold statement, I'm even factoring in an adjustment for the typical "new job" excitement.
The firm I work for is basically a start up firm. It's nine months old. There are only three attorneys and three other staff members. But, we office share with a couple other attorneys and their staff so it seems much bigger. I have a bright office with a window overlooking a cute Seattle neighborhood.
Instead of handling intense, stressfull, complex cases, we pretty much stick to car accident cases. One would think this would get old after a while, but (as I discovered in my last position as an associate attorney) when you handle cases in litigation, law never gets old. You always have new clients to meet. New opposing counsel to deal with. New cases to investigate. New witnesses to interview. And when you handle cases in multiple different counties, keeping up with the local court rules always keeps you on your toes. And the people... oh, the people! Clients are pretty hilarious. Opposing counsel can be either fun or frustrating. And it's a neat thing to build close relationships with insurance adjusters (who, in turn, give you more business).
My work is a fabulous mix of wonderful coworkers and bosses, challenging work (and a lot of it!), and an office space that instills a sense of pride.
My commute sucks. Depending upon whether it's my turn to drop the kids off in the morning, it is either 2 hours or 2.5 hours ONE WAY. But I'm no stranger to long sucky commutes and at least I'm getting 2-4 miles of walking in everyday. And, for the most part, riding a ferry everyday isn't THAT bad. I have plenty of time to get some extra work in, or read a book, or take a nap. Plus, this is only temporary. After the first four weeks, I'll be working from home two days a week (score!).
This is the passenger only ferry that I rode in to work on Friday- looks like a yacht!
And here is my typical morning commute view:
Commute aside, it all boils down to one thing: I love what I do and I look forward to going to the office. I love it so much that I feel like my time away from my children is time well-spent. If I can't be with them, at least I am doing something fulfilling, challenging, and fun. When you love your work, enjoy the people you work with, and earn fair compensation for your effort, that, my friends, is called the Employment Jackpot!
It's been a while since I've read a court case that wasn't part of a legal research project for work. But tonight, as I was catching up on my political news, it dawned on me to look up and read last year's Supreme Court decision on Obamacare (yes, this was my wild Saturday night and, yes, I do have issues). When I discovered that the original opinion is nearly 200 pages long, I decided to just stick with the summary. But I became to engrossed that I kept reading. The first couple pages of the opinion is a REALLY good primer on the roles of the Federal versus State governments and the "enumerated powers" of the Federal government versus the broad "police powers" of the States. It totally re-kindled my love for Constitutional Law.
Oh man, I love it. I love it all! I am a total law geek. This (in addition to insurance coverage issues) is the kind of stuff that gets me hot and bothered. And....the Commerce Clause! Shiver. Reading about enumerated powers and the Commerce Clause has the same affect on me as, I'm imaging, the movie Magic Mike has on *normal* people.
If it weren't for the whole lawyer thing, I would be chomping at the bit to be a Political Science professor, or to have a job in politics.
Speaking of the "lawyer thing," I am also falling back in love with my profession. I think I have the best job in the world. It is seriously awesome. And in making that bold statement, I'm even factoring in an adjustment for the typical "new job" excitement.
The firm I work for is basically a start up firm. It's nine months old. There are only three attorneys and three other staff members. But, we office share with a couple other attorneys and their staff so it seems much bigger. I have a bright office with a window overlooking a cute Seattle neighborhood.
Instead of handling intense, stressfull, complex cases, we pretty much stick to car accident cases. One would think this would get old after a while, but (as I discovered in my last position as an associate attorney) when you handle cases in litigation, law never gets old. You always have new clients to meet. New opposing counsel to deal with. New cases to investigate. New witnesses to interview. And when you handle cases in multiple different counties, keeping up with the local court rules always keeps you on your toes. And the people... oh, the people! Clients are pretty hilarious. Opposing counsel can be either fun or frustrating. And it's a neat thing to build close relationships with insurance adjusters (who, in turn, give you more business).
My work is a fabulous mix of wonderful coworkers and bosses, challenging work (and a lot of it!), and an office space that instills a sense of pride.
My commute sucks. Depending upon whether it's my turn to drop the kids off in the morning, it is either 2 hours or 2.5 hours ONE WAY. But I'm no stranger to long sucky commutes and at least I'm getting 2-4 miles of walking in everyday. And, for the most part, riding a ferry everyday isn't THAT bad. I have plenty of time to get some extra work in, or read a book, or take a nap. Plus, this is only temporary. After the first four weeks, I'll be working from home two days a week (score!).
This is the passenger only ferry that I rode in to work on Friday- looks like a yacht!
And here is my typical morning commute view:
(Did I mention I love Seattle?)
Commute aside, it all boils down to one thing: I love what I do and I look forward to going to the office. I love it so much that I feel like my time away from my children is time well-spent. If I can't be with them, at least I am doing something fulfilling, challenging, and fun. When you love your work, enjoy the people you work with, and earn fair compensation for your effort, that, my friends, is called the Employment Jackpot!
Thursday, September 20, 2012
Beginning
First Day:
Heels, bouse, and skirt.
2.5 hour commute to work: car, ferry, bus, walking.
Gorgeous Seattle skyline rising above the fog
Bright new office.
View of a cute neighborhood.
Delicious steak salad at a cajun restaurant.
My name on pretty letter head.
Sending faxes via e-mail (Mind BLOWN!)
Re-learning how to bill clients.
Two motions completed! (Simple motions, but...MOTIONS!)
2.5 hour commute home: walking, bus, ferry, car.
Missing my ferry by two minutes.
Walking in the door to give my two boys a huge hug.
Take out thai dinner with husband.
Snuggling with my babies before bedtime.
Exhausted.
Heels, bouse, and skirt.
2.5 hour commute to work: car, ferry, bus, walking.
Gorgeous Seattle skyline rising above the fog
Bright new office.
View of a cute neighborhood.
Delicious steak salad at a cajun restaurant.
My name on pretty letter head.
Sending faxes via e-mail (Mind BLOWN!)
Re-learning how to bill clients.
Two motions completed! (Simple motions, but...MOTIONS!)
2.5 hour commute home: walking, bus, ferry, car.
Missing my ferry by two minutes.
Walking in the door to give my two boys a huge hug.
Take out thai dinner with husband.
Snuggling with my babies before bedtime.
Exhausted.
Wednesday, September 19, 2012
Doubt....And Bear
Big day tomorrow. I start my new job. It's been over a year since I've been a REAL attorney.
I'm totally excited to get my hands dirty and to take charge of cases in litigation once again. I'm even crossing my fingers that there will be some motions that need to be written when I walk into the office tomorrow. What I wouldn't give to write a summary judgment motion on liability or causation. Or, better yet, a complex motion in limine. Those are my fave!
Although I'm very anxious to start my new job, for some reason there is a little bit of doubt in me that I never expected to be there. Doubt that this is the wrong choice. And doubt that I won't be good at the new job. I'm nervous that I've forgotten how to do things. Hopefully, issuing discovery will be like riding a bike?
The real source of my nerves is the fact that I think only one of the partners of the firm wanted to hire me. Sounds like he fought for me. This must be how Prez GWB felt when he took office after the majority of Americans didn't even vote for him (remember the electoral college and hanging chads?). I feel this tremendous pressure to be extraordinary. To prove that I can do the job, and do it better than anyone else. The pressure is weighing me down. It's clouding my excitement. It's making me feel sick. And, OMG. What if I suck?
Go away self doubt! GO AWAY!
To end on a happier note, here are some shameless pics of my favorite teddy bear.
I'm totally excited to get my hands dirty and to take charge of cases in litigation once again. I'm even crossing my fingers that there will be some motions that need to be written when I walk into the office tomorrow. What I wouldn't give to write a summary judgment motion on liability or causation. Or, better yet, a complex motion in limine. Those are my fave!
Although I'm very anxious to start my new job, for some reason there is a little bit of doubt in me that I never expected to be there. Doubt that this is the wrong choice. And doubt that I won't be good at the new job. I'm nervous that I've forgotten how to do things. Hopefully, issuing discovery will be like riding a bike?
The real source of my nerves is the fact that I think only one of the partners of the firm wanted to hire me. Sounds like he fought for me. This must be how Prez GWB felt when he took office after the majority of Americans didn't even vote for him (remember the electoral college and hanging chads?). I feel this tremendous pressure to be extraordinary. To prove that I can do the job, and do it better than anyone else. The pressure is weighing me down. It's clouding my excitement. It's making me feel sick. And, OMG. What if I suck?
Go away self doubt! GO AWAY!
To end on a happier note, here are some shameless pics of my favorite teddy bear.
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