Monday, September 17, 2012

1.2.3.

photo by Renee Walton Photography


I remember sitting on the edge of her sister's bed nights before she was born
Wondering how in the world I'd be able to love the child growing within me as much as the one slumbering before me
It's hard to understand how a love so deep, unfathomable can be multiplied
Truly, it must be experienced
And after a whirlwind labor and delivery 
When they placed her in my arms
Experience it, I did
This squinty eyed, blotchy faced infant starred up at me
Looking like a worn and weary traveller who had reached home at last
And we named her
Bringer of joy
Because we knew she would
And celebration 
Because she was and is
Everyday 
That quirky, brilliant smile
That fills her face and brightens my heart
Those bouncing golden curls
That trail behind her as she swooshes back and forth, around and around
Endless energy and happiness and life
My heart melts when she asks, "Mama, you 'nuggle me?"
Yes, my darling.
The answer is always yes.
Because as quickly as I can count
1. 2. 3.
These moments. These gifts.
They are flying by.
But she has found the most perfect ways to create a pause.
Her silly answer to my question: 
"Tait, why you so cute?"
"Is from my mudder!"
Makes time stand still as we throw our heads back and laugh
Til there are tears in our eyes and an ache in our belly
And then at night as I peak in 
All is slow and still and sweet
Her Eggy rabbit cinched in tight
Thumb in mouth like that first night in the hospital
I drink in the smell of a day's well worn toddler 
I kiss a warm puffy cheek
And I count
1.2.3.
As I close the door on another cherished moment
That I must tuck away 
Deep inside

Happy 3rd birthday, Taitum Jubilee!
Your Mama loves you more than all my kisses or tightest squeezes can explain! 
(You make my heart shine.)


photo by Renee Walton Photography

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